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:iconghearradh: More from ghearradh


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Devious Collection by Chandevi


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Submitted on
May 11, 2013
File Size
428 bytes
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Sta.sh
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407
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30 (who?)
Comments
19
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rain covered your body
like skin covered mine
{ its just another day; }
the wind in your hair
stars in your eyes
{ i didn't know what happened to you
or your pale blue wrists;
}
the forest in your heart is pounding
on the door to the ocean in mine.
i feel better. so much better.
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:iconnixitrixi:
nixitrixi Featured By Owner May 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
your work has been featured here: [link]
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:iconghearradh:
ghearradh Featured By Owner May 15, 2013
thank you thank you thank you
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:iconmegzluvsyouall:
MegzLuvsYouAll Featured By Owner May 13, 2013
I love this poem. Simple, yet very beautiful. I really do love this.
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:iconghearradh:
ghearradh Featured By Owner May 13, 2013
thank you so much :heart:
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:icondragonschest:
DragonsChest Featured By Owner May 12, 2013  Professional Writer
This is really lovely...
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:iconghearradh:
ghearradh Featured By Owner May 13, 2013
thank you so much! :D
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:icondragonschest:
DragonsChest Featured By Owner May 18, 2013  Professional Writer
:iconpenguindanceplz::iconwelcome1plz::iconwelcome2plz::iconwelcome3plz::iconwelcome4plz:
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:iconcality:
cality Featured By Owner May 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Delicate and beautifully written. Just a small thing, but I'm not keen on the 'the wind in your hair / stars in your eyes' section; compared to the lovely and strong images in the rest of the poem, that bit feels very cliché. I absolutely love the last two lines though – wonderful work!
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:iconghearradh:
ghearradh Featured By Owner May 13, 2013
yes, now that i look at it again it does feel a bit cliche.

thank you so much for your feedback! :D
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:iconcality:
cality Featured By Owner May 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No problem! :aww:
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